Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Randomize
