I'm sorry my penis didn't work
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
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The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
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And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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