thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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