that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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