he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
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