remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
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