In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
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