Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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