Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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