It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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