i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
