You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
