I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
The air was thick with penises
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
