New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I intend to get homeless drunk
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
