is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Bring me that man meat
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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