they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Randomize
