I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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