thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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