She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
