just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
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