Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
