i jhust puked up my retainher.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
