just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
