No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
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It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
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