I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
