Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize