I'm laying in your front yard are you home
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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