she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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