woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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