I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
