I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
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