ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
No he was cute and I said yes!
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Moan for me like Helen Keller
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
do you believe in love at first sight?
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
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