I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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