i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
