the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize