puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I have fence marks all over my body
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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