what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
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