this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
