Have some text gold?

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  • Sorry, i can't come to the phone right now because i'm a dick.

    Submitted by shamrock2112 on Jun 20, 12 at 3:39pm
  • Hello? Yes, this is penis...

    Submitted by NYCdood on Jun 20, 12 at 4:26pm
  • What's that slapping noise? Oh god it's texting me D:

    Submitted by WesPip on Jun 20, 12 at 3:54pm
  • If he's comes too quick, then his dick's phone is probably a Palm Pre.

    Submitted by Croooooooooow on Jun 21, 12 at 12:02am
  • A new level is douche-bag is invented. This is worthy of a new Jersey Shore character.

    Submitted by cfreymarc on Jun 20, 12 at 10:04pm
  • You people do realize that of it was about a woman buying a cell phone for her vajayjay there would be 100 whore comments by now

    Submitted by kushkong420 on Jun 20, 12 at 7:35pm
    • indeed, even normal funny posts about gettting pregnant or having a baby gets crazy "you should have used birth control" commentary

      Submitted by GAEA_KALI on Jun 20, 12 at 11:41pm
    • I have a comment for you-the term 'vajajay' should never be used. Ever.

      Submitted by Kevin201 on Jun 21, 12 at 8:55am
  • Getting a separate phone just for hookups makes a certain amount of sense if you're sleeping with that many people.

    Submitted by arthurlux on Jun 20, 12 at 4:33pm
  • Omg that's is freaking awesome

    Submitted by Kaylib2514 on Jun 20, 12 at 10:26pm
  • "Phone call for mike hoch!"

    Submitted by porksword on Jun 20, 12 at 5:43pm
  • Dick Tracy?

    Submitted by finalflash08 on Jun 20, 12 at 3:39pm
  • "asshole!"\n"wrong number, this is dick"

    Submitted by kashleymoney on Jun 27, 12 at 1:10am
  • Hi, thanks for calling me. Since I have no ears, I have no idea what you are saying.

    Submitted by Nickly on Jun 20, 12 at 3:49pm
  • Haveing a designated hook ups phone makes sense if your sleeping with that many people... I hope you use a condom cause I don't think his dick will be happy about geting the "I'm pregos" call

    Submitted by kgirl1992 on Jun 20, 12 at 7:19pm
  • Douche-baggery taken to a whole new level.

    Submitted by Cannibalcake on Jun 21, 12 at 5:32am
  • Brilliant. I wish I'd thought of this back during my Multiple Booty Calls Per Week phase. My dick would probably thank me.

    Submitted by technoir on Jun 21, 12 at 9:21am
  • #TFM

    Submitted by hellur on Jun 20, 12 at 11:16pm
  • what a freakin' pimp.. I can only wish!

    Submitted by Cocaineranger on Jun 20, 12 at 6:23pm
  • Separate hookup phone. The ultimate tool in infidelity.

    Submitted by nitro420 on Jun 20, 12 at 8:15pm
  • Nahh. That's straight up bogus. You KNOW he will be selfish in bed if he pulls something like that.

    Submitted by chitownirishgirl on Jul 2, 14 at 4:49am
  • Mr Clark is not a toy! now put him back in the new years ball where his corpse belongs

    Submitted by gabraham on Jun 20, 12 at 4:13pm
  • Mine has a 1-900 number

    Submitted by W_T_F on Jun 20, 12 at 7:28pm