so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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