2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
