It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
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