why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Randomize
