census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
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