I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
i dont even know how to be here
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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