The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
should my penis look like a turkey
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize