yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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