He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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