this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
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his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
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I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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