I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
25 Men Confess The Moment They Knew They Wanted To Marry Their Wife
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
You Wouldn’t Guess That These 25 Celebrities Are Complete A**holes
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?