why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
How's work?
Spinning.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
